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Written by Katie on July 16, 2017

Modesty from a mom’s perspective

Family

OK so today, I have decided to blog about a topic that is often discussed in my home.  With a house full of young people, it seems we are always talking about the proper way to dress.

Warning:  I am not going to be sharing scriptures on this topic today just personal thoughts.  (as a family we have studied this topic out many times in scripture so I will refer to our understanding of YHVH God’s guidelines, but not share chapter and verse.)

This past week I was sitting with a friend and we were watching as people walked by at the fair.  It was shocking the clothing choices people had made for the day.  So, I began thinking why and how we as a family came to decided what is proper attire.

My husband and I started guiding our kids clothing choices when they were young.  So that when they got older and were making choices for themselves, they would have a mindset of modesty.

Things we decided to focus on:

  1.  Too tight.  Jeremy says if you can see the outline of your body then you might as well be naked.  NOw when he first told me this I was a slim 5’2″, 110 pound woman.  I often wore leggings for pants.  He said he didn’t appreciate women wearing leggings out side the privacy of their own homes because they are extremely revealing.  I admit I never considered it a problem before that.  So, after that I began to only wear form fitting clothes under other clothes.  Later when our family began to study scripture we learned that YHVH God doesn’t want us to expose our thighs.  This revelation gave us a guide line of how to cover our bottom half more properly. )
  2. Cover your thighs.  So if we are wearing leggings or tight jeans we now try and cover with a dress or blouse to our knees, so to cover our thighs.  This is the same reason we do wear something under our blouses or dresses to cover our thighs completely.
  3. To the knee.  This is basically the same as cover your thighs.  Shorts and or skirts for men and women should cover the thighs completely.  So to meet this requirement we wear our shorts longer.
  4. Camel toe, NO NO NO.  If your pants, shorts, or bottoms reveal your private parts in anyway then they need to be covered or  changed.  The easiest way to know if this may be a problem is: was it hard to pull you bottoms on or to zip them, then they are probably too tight.  This goes for men as well, boys private parts should not be exposed either.
  5. MEn should look like men and women like women.  This does not mean women can only wear dresses.  It does mean that it is NOT cute or acceptable for men or women to wear clothes that are clearly made for the opposite sex.
  6.  When you look in the mirror are you dressed for God’s glory, or to be noticed by others.  There is a fine line between looking nice and dressing for attention.  We should always dress so others see us as set apart unto YHVH and to give Him glory, NOT to catch the eye of others.
  7. Cleavage cover.  This one is tricky.  This is a cultural issue not a Biblical one.  Here in America, breasts have become a sex symbol and cause of lust.  So we as women need to consider this when we dress our top half.  Blouses, t-shirts, tops should not be too tight as to expose the outline of our body.  Also, the cut of our blouse should try and cover any excessive exposure of our breasts.  Layering of tops is a great way to cover.
  8. Breast support goes a long way.  A good bra can help keep cleavage and exposure to a minimum.

(Now I am going to be honest, in my opinion breasts are a beautiful creation from YHVH for feeding one’s children.  When a woman is nursing an infant it is hard to keep things locked away and under cover.  Unfortunately, in our sick society lust is rampant.  So we need to be aware of others looking at us inappriately.)

OK, so these are the basic standards of how we teach our children to dress themselves in a modest way.  But what about number 5, how should women and men dress to clearly look the part?

IN our home we want our girls to dress not only modestly but like ladies. Dresses are nice, and skirts too, but not always practical or comfortable in certain situations.  So, the best advice we can give our children is this:  wear clothes that are clearly meant for your sex.  Now there are some things in our culture that are gender neutral.  Sometimes it is hard with jeans and shorts, but basically dress in clothes that say I am a girl or I am a boy.

There it is.  That is my two cents worth on how to dress in a society where very few people even care about modesty.  Where women tend to care more about being a strong and feminine woman than a modest one.  But it matters. I freely admit it is hard to afford and find modest clothing, and we as a family are not perfect at this standard.

But when we dress modestly we show others we value ourselves.  We show God we value His standard.  We also show common sense, this world is full of fallen people who want nothing more than to take advantage of someone else. Modest dress shows you are intelligent and aware of your surroundings.  IT is a way of keeping yourself from harm.

I would love to hear feedback on this topic.

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