Today is Preparation Day at our house (that is, it is Friday). We call it preparation day because it is the day we prepare our heart and home for a Sabbath rest. At Sundown, it will be Sabbath, and until the next sundown we will take a day to rest and reflect on our LORD YHVH, creator and maker of heaven and earth and Savior of our souls, Yeshua.
This prep day, I am laying in my bed in the dark and quiet. This is a humbling experience for me, and it is an experience, I have had two weeks in a row now. Instead, of being busy, with the work that is to be done today, I am laying in my bed trying to rest.
Because I have a terrible migraine and a terrible pain in my abdomen. I spent the long night last night in the ER. This was NOT my plan. This is NOT the way I want to be spending my day.
Yet, this is my reality.
It has been almost two years now since I received the diagnosis of Hashimotos disease. For some reason, I was so relieved to finally have a diagnosis for what was ailing me, and I thought that now I would get “all better.” You know the doctors would give me some medicine and a health plan and I would be good to go. Well, that has not been the case. No instead, this sickness has humbled me in ways I truly had no desire to be humbled.
It seems I have caught every illness this past year that has gone around due to my weakened immune system. It seems that my hormones do not care what medication I do or don’t take they have a mind of their own. It seems that just when I think I know what to eat or not to eat, my body decides to change its mind.
So, today I am suppose to be resting, and as I lay in bed I can hear my children working all around the house. They are good workers and truly don’t need me to supervise or work. This too is a bit humbling. You know there are those jobs that you always, as a mom, do yourself. The last two weeks, I have had to let my oldest daughters do those jobs for me. It has been hard to admit that they one, don’t need me, and two, can do the jobs their way instead of mine.
So, today is preparation day, and I am not preparing food or my home, but YHVH is preparing my heart. I am learning to trust in His ways and His plan. This illness is not in charge, but the Great I AM is.